First of all, no chappie to post today. So very sorry, but that’ll happen soon enough.
I just had to post and complain about prudish, trolling assholes who review my story on fanfic.net, anonymously mind you, to tell me the following:
“I am very highly offended that you had Eric calling Sookie an “artful…little…w***”. That is extremely derogatory and disrespectful. I’m truly surprised and ashamed of you for that.”
First of all, I can’t believe this person got through 57 chapters of PRETTY KITTY and is just now finding something to get offended about. Between Eric and Sookie, I’ve had them use the words cock, dick, pussy, cunt, asshole, bitch, goddammit, fuck you, fuck this, fuck that, shit, and fag. I use them because their True Blood counterparts use them all the time. I CANNOT believe someone with such delicate sensibilities would a) even like the show and b) read very hard core stories about it. My stories are not cute. They’re not fuzzy and sweet. They’re not fucking Twilight. They’re True Blood. Highly offended? You’re in the wrong fanfic. Stick to Sandra Bullock movies like While You Were Sleeping and read only uplifting, girl-power dreck like The Secret Life of Bees.
My second, angrier objection (aside from them posting anonymously) is that this person managed to take that phrase completely out of context. Eric was not calling Sookie a whore, he was TEASING HER, in one of the many instances that they tease each other, when Sookie joked that she’d barter sex for leniency when he beat her at chess. I am astounded. What kind of literal sociopath can’t tell the difference? Who among us doesn’t smiling call our friends and loved ones jerks, bitches, whores and douchebags? Do we mean it? Of course not. Does the other person know that? Obviously, and will usually retaliate with a choice insult of their own.
This person says they’re ashamed of me.
I pity them.
I also highly recommend they stop reading my stuff asap. It’s full of subtexts and subtleties and -worst of all- dirty words, all engineered to entertain the witty and horrify people who gasp when a thousand year old vampire drops anything worse than “gosh darnit”.
The man called his sister a cunt, for crissakes. He threatened to kill Pam. He joked that children are tasty. He’s killed how many people? He murdered a man he was simultaneously screwing. I don’t ever want to hear another person hold him to some ridiculous moral standard, or me for trying to write him faithfully.
I know the vast majority of you are like me, so I’m sorry for the rant that’s not aimed at you. I’m just pissed off.
I love you guys. Fight trolls.